Lurrve Incidents!...

Sometimes you hear such unexpected stories from unexpected sources in unexpected situations that it's quite cool.

Now I'm a very sympathetic listener (if I like or am indifferent to the speaker. If I don't like him/her I'm extremely judgmental, irritable and short. Just a friendly warning) and a good secret keeper and thus end up having a lot of friends sharing their deepest, darkest secrets to me. Also, I surreptitiously enjoy playing shrink and thus I kinda like this state of affairs.

But this post is not about that. And being a secret-keeper-extraordinaire you certainly can't expect me to put stories of people I know up on this blog (D-uh). This is about two weird situations I heard of in strange circumstances. I heard one of them just yesterday and was immediately reminded of the first one.

Circa 2005
Mumbai
2 am

Full masala story

(Can you please imagine the above coordinates appearing letter by letter on the bottom left corner of your screen with a typing sound in the background? Thanks)

I was returning from AG's place in Pune and had just got off the bus at Dadar. I took an auto from there to my hotel in Santa Cruz.

And I have to describe the auto. It was a jazzy thing with blue light streaming inside and outside it. Lots of plastic decorations around the multiple Shahrukh Khan and Hrithik Roshan pictures pasted all over. The biggest decoration for the auto though, was it's driver. A young guy in a open collar uniform shirt which was thrown back, a couple of buttons open showing off multiple black thread lockets. The kind of guy who comes to Mumbai to become a film star. The kind of guy who would have a Rajnikanth hairstyle were he in South India. Out there he had to make to with a rather faded Shahrukh Khan one.

We (he) started talking and within five minutes the conversation turned towards the GIRL in his life. Most people may be subtle while talking about their girlfriend to a stranger. But this guy, no way! He lived his life on full volume and spoke about her in the same way.

"Bhaiyya, woh bahut acchi hai, sundar hai, XYZ school mein teacher hai."

[She's very nice, pretty. She's a teacher at XYZ school]

And the coup de grace:

"Bhaiyya, main uske liye jaan bhi de sakta hun!"

[Brother, I can sacrifice my life for her!]

And because I gave him the sympathetic ear (at 2 am!) I heard his entire story. How he met her, how he used to reach her school so he could ferry her to her house. How they fell for each other.

And then the parents came into the picture. And there was conflict as both sets of parents didn't approve. But they stood by each other and fought all four parents and have convinced them now. And that he was collecting money so that he could buy his auto and then get married.

Full masala story. And yes, I gave him some extra money to go in his nest egg for the future. After all, I've been raised on these filmi love story romantic movies and want my hero and heroine to live happily ever after. Doesn't the romantic in everyone wants to see such stories succeed?

And you know the best part I like about this story - there were no complications between the girl and the guy at all. They knew right from the beginning that they wanted to be with each other. That's such a cool thing to have and something I don't think i've ever experienced on account of being too logical :(


CIRCA 2010
Bangalore
6pm

A rather cute problem

As you know I have some personal strife going on right now. I have been forced by circumstances and an over eager flatmate to hunt for either a new flatmate or to get a new house. (about that. What kind of readers are you? Except one friend who put my heartfelt request a couple of blog posts ago on Twitter, none of you gave any leads at all! Horrible).

So anyway, I am currently meeting these real estate brokers who take you around to properties which are to be let out for rent. I met one such broker a couple of days back and then again yesterday.

He's actually a college student studying for his engineering degree. He also helps out his brother in this business.

And he has a problem.

Guy: "Bhaiyya, aapke paas bhi Sony Ericsson phone hai na?"
[You have a Sony Ericsson phone as well, right?]

Swapnil: "Yes"

Guy (with a pleading look in his eyes]: "Aapko pata hai ki mera phone lock kaise karte hain?"
[Do you know how to lock my phone?]

Swapnil (knowing wry smile): "Kyun? Girlfriend ke messages chhupaane hain?"
[Why? You want to hide your girlfriend's messages?]

Guy (glad to find some understanding): "Haan Bhaiyya, mere gharwaale mere phone ko chhedte rehte hain!"

[Yes, my family keeps fiddling with my phone!"

Apparently, his brother fiddles with his cell phone and ends up reading his, umm, private messages! (And yes, this is a common problem. When will they finally learn that reading someone's messages is akin to opening someones letters in their generation. You just should NOT do that!)

So we left the house hunting for some time while I went through the settings in the phone trying to find the lock which would prevent his brother's prying eyes and derisive humour. But the phone does not have such a lock!

Come to think of it, even my cell phone doesn't have a phone lock feature. Do Sony-Ericsson phones not have this feature? Help, somebody! We should all rally around to help him!


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